Maturity

We're all getting older and wiser. Tayton will be four this month. He amazes me with the things he thinks about. He notices radio towers and tells us what they are for. He wants his sandwiches cut in "rectangles and triangles". He understands fairness in everything. We were watching my sister in law's Yorkie, Lexie, this weekend. Phoebe is very attached to Tayton. Everytime Tayton would start to play with Lexie, Phoebe would jump up and kiss him to get his attention. He noticed her behavior and asked me why Phoebe was doing that. I explained that Phoebe just wanted his attention and didn't want him to love Lexie more. He responded with, "But mom, I love them both."
Tyler has moved up to the youth group. They had the campout at Pastor's last weekend. His first time in that group. It was a great weekend, we had ten kids, three adults. Paul and I really enjoyed being part of that. I went tubing behind the ski boat with one of our senior girls. We faced forward, not knowing that this was not the best choice. Her tube was behind me, so she got all the spray from my tube, right in her face. And then the ropes that hold the tubes, well let's just say I was holding on tight and thinking of all the things I hadn't yet done in my life and this was not such a good idea. As we crossed each corner, the tubes would cross each other, boucing across the wake. I was thinking of things like how much it would hurt to flip off, get tangled in the ropes and thus being hit by the girl behind me as I flew back. After two laps around the large lake, I putting these common sense things together and asked to stop. Course Tyler was the spotter and thought it was quite funny to hear his mom scream so he wasn't offering any help with getting the boat to shore. We made it though, all in one piece, no injuries to us. We were the first to go, which was a good thing. The rest of the gang got pretty banged up, one freshman boy got a black swollen eye, a Jr. High girl, also hurt her leg- also fell off and then hitting said freshman- her brother. So I wonder what their parents though as we brought them home. Really though, that was all fun- everyone did it again the next day- sept me:-) Paul waterskiied and tried to teach Tyler and another boy how to. We cooked over an open fire- that was fun- really. I like see how much we can do with one frying pan and a tripod grilling grate. We had egg and sausage mcmuffins in the morning- made over the camp fire and kept warm in the cast iron dutch oven. Those things are really cool. We made bbq chicken- pulled chicken and then put it on buns for dinner the night we got there. The chicken was cooked at home and so we just cooked it and the veggies and homemade bbq sauce for a few hours. It was very good- a boy scout recipe and we were just fortunate to have that boy scout with us. The highlight for the both of us was watching twin brothers experience alot of firsts on this trip. They had never been camping, never been fishing, never tubed or went on a boat. They didn't want to go tubing the first day- probably after seeing the injuries. But Tyler said he'd go with each one and Paul drove the boat and they were promised that they would go slow and if they wanted to stop, they would stop right away. So the morning we were leaving, the boys decided they were ready to try it. Both of them just totally loved it, were shouting and laughing and asking to go faster. Their dad is an over the road truck driver and is gone three weeks at a time, sometimes longer. So even at 12 or 13, they haven't done a whole lot. When we met back at the church- the boys were so excited and told their mom and dad how much fun they had tubing and that they had the boat going as fast as it could go. That brings tears to my eyes even today. It was a great weekend.
Katia is also growing. Every Sunday morning, she changes her clothes at least four times trying to find just the right combination. She gets frustrated with her hair and the wave in it. Hmm, I can relate. She is always the one that can sense when mom is upset though- she'll give me hug and tell me that she loves me. She's very intuiative. And her and fishing- it's all she wants to do. She's got the bug for sure. I think she likes fishing more than Tyler. I was proud of her at church yesterday though. An older friend and her were sitting together in front of us in the first pew. Since Katia is nine now, she stays upstairs for the church service. The friend, Casey, kept trying to distract her, whispering and giggling. Katia kept her focus pretty well though.
And then there's me. I've been going to Calvary for six years this Sept. And the Sunday school class and the women's bible study has really pushed me into a new level of growth. I'm not satisfied with what the teacher is saying, so I dig into it on my own. In so many areas, it contradicts what our pastor has taught. Legalism is such a big thing. After reading in Galations 6 yesterday and hearing that anyone that practices legalism should be "emasculated" or castrated- not allowed to reproduce, it is quite a serious sin. I know I have had legalistic thoughts. I've thought, I wonder where so and so is. They are always in SS and now they aren't. Or thought, why doesn't so and so ever want to serve. So there is room for growth that's for sure. I hadn't ever thought when you say to someone, "I didn't see you Sunday, are you okay?" that that was legalism. Course, I can honestly say, that me being the worrier that I am, that I am genuinely concerned that someone is sick or in need. The majority of our congregation is elderly. I guess it just means more self examining to be sure that you aren't falling into legalism without realizing it. It's a slippery slope. I was in the office the other night, working. Two others were with me chatting. The conversation after a while turned into gossip. Well, I just blurted, "oh my gosh, we are gossiping, we need to stop right now." I've heard gossip before and I usually just walk away, but for me to speak out like that was completely not me, that was the holy spirit correcting us. I was kind of shocked that the spirit just took over like that.
Last night, Paul and I were disagreeing about something. I walked away and sat in the moonlight dark of night praying. Looking to God for the answers. I sat there for a half hour and heard his voice. I was being spoiled and selfish. So I apoligized to Paul. Six years ago, that was the draw to the Lord. A marriage that wasn't so great. The realization from what the Pastor was saying, that people will always let you down, but that God won't. God is always there, God's love is unconditional, and that he loves you like no one else can. So in everything, we should pray for the answers we need. Now would I call myself selfish and spoiled- no, not me. But God did and I accept that I can be at times. I want things done right away or after a year of waiting, I get gnarly. But just because it's been a year of waiting, it doesn't mean that I can be sassy about it. Love is patient, Love is kind...growth is a good thing.